The Simpsons Bracket: Day 3 – Lisa’s Day


By: Connor Lenahan

Previously: Moe’s Tavern Region/Nuclear Power Plant Region.

Waking up to “Deep Space Homer” is a great way to start any day. With The Simpsons Marathon entering its third day we are right in the middle of the best stretch the show ever had from seasons 4 through 8. Another day spent with America’s funniest family means it’s time to see what will be joining “You Only Move Twice” and “Homer The Great” in the final eight of the tournament. This is the Springfield Elementary region. As always, the seedings are random and mean nothing, while we also won’t waste time when a classic faces a scrub. Good? Good.


Round 1:

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Outright Victories:

“When You Dish Upon A Star” over “Bart Stops to Smell the Roosevelts,” “When Flanders Failed” over “How I Wet Your Mother,” “All’s Fair In Over War” over “The Greatest Story Ever D’ohed,” “New Kid On The Block” over “Please Homer, Don’t Hammer ‘Em,” “I Love Lisa” over “Pray Anything,” “Hungry, Hungry Homer” over “The 90’s Show,” “The Homer They Fall” over “Large Marge,” “Krusty Gets Kancelled” over “”The Otto Show,” “Lisa The Skeptic” over “Marge in Chains,” “Round Springfield” over “The Fight Before Christmas,” “The Day The Violence Died” over “Marge vs. SSCCTG,” “Brother’s Little Helper” over “Little Big Girl,” “Bart After Dark” over “Faith Off,” “Homer’s Barbershop Quartet” over “No Loan Again, Naturally,” “Homerpalooza” over “Moonshine River,” “Lisa’s Wedding” over “I’m With Cupid,” “King of the Hill” over “Sunday, Cruddy Sunday,” “Lisa’s Substitute” over “How The Test Was Won,” “Girly Edition” over “Once Upon a Time in Springfield.”

Coin Flips:

“Take My Wife, Sleaze” over “’Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky,” “I’m Going to Praiseland” over “American History X-Cellent,” “Homer and Ned’s Hail Mary Pass” over “Papa Don’t Leech,” “Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot” over “Rednecks and Broomsticks.”


“Poppa’s Got a Brand New Badge” over “Behind The Laughter” – Two of my personal favorite episodes from the post-season 10 era. I happen to love “Poppa’s Got a Brand New Badge” for a reason they mention in the episode – it’s one of the few times Homer is actually good at his job and it results in him being targeted by the mob. It’s terrific.

“Stark Raving Dad” over “Lisa’s Pony” – I would like to take a moment to express my affinity for pink shirts and my mental health stability.

“All Singing, All Dancing” over “The Wife Aquatic” – It’s small, but when Homer ejects the tape of “Paint Your Wagon” from the VCR directly into the trash I burst out laughing. It’s a slept on visual gag I happen to love.

“Flaming Moe’s” over “HOMR” – I love, love, love “HOMR,” but even I know that this is a clear choice. There’s just too much wonderful about “Flaming Moe’s” to pass on.

“I D’oh-bot” over “Krusty Gets Busted” – I’m going with a bit of an upset here. I happen to think that “I-D’oh-bot” is a pretty strong episode that’s ever stronger against the other episodes at the time. Plus watching Homer shoot the Robo-Ralph in the face slays me every time.

“Holidays of Future Passed” over “Principal Charming” – It’s the best episode of the last five years against a mid-level season two episode. There’s a beautiful heart to “Holidays of Future Passed” that pushes it through.”

“Marge Gets a Job” over “The Call of the Simpsons” – “You don’t have to sue me to get my pants off” is the greatest law school pickup line in history.

“Mr. Lisa Goes To Washington” over “Bart vs. Thanksgiving” – “Mr. Lisa Goes To Washington” was going to win regardless, but I saw a point on Twitter from Homer’s Ass Grove (@HomersAssGrove) that Bart is really a prick in the latter episode. Makes it a tough watch voluntarily.


Round 2:

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Outright Victories:

“When Flanders Failed” over “When You Dish Upon A Star,” “New Kid on the Block” over “All Singing, All Dancing,” “I Love Lisa” over “Take My Wife, Sleaze,” “Round Springfield” over “I’m Goin’ to Praiseland,” “The Day the Violence Died” over “Brother’s Little Helper,” “Homer’s Barbershop Quartet” over “I D’oh-bot,” “Lisa’s Wedding” over “King of the Hill,” “Lisa’s Substitute” over “Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot,” “Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington” over “Girly Edition.”

Coin Flips:

“The Sweetest Apu” over “All’s Fair in Oven War,” “Marge Gets a Job” over “Homer and Ned’s Hail Mary Pass.”


“Stark Raving Dad” over “Poppa’s Got a Brand New Badge” – Who would have ever thought that Homer and Michael Jackson would have gotten along with each other as well as they do?

“The Homer They Fall” over “Hungry, Hungry Homer” – Homer’s wonderful climb to the top of the ranks of heavyweight boxing moves on, but I’d like to take a second to shout out “Me so hungie” as a line I quote at least once a week.

“Krusty Gets Kancelled” over “Lisa the Skeptic” – It’s heavy on guest stars, but damn if they aren’t great. Johnny Carson was amazing on screen and off, in fact, possibly more impressive off given his superhuman strength.

“Flaming Moe’s” over “Bart After Dark” – While the burlesque house is fun, there looks to be nothing more fun in the world than Moe’s Tavern during the peak of the Flaming Moe. I mean, Aerosmith even comes to play. It’s awesome.

“Homerpalooza” over “Holidays of Future Passed” – I hope one day to meet Billy Corgan from The Smashing Pumpkins and have the same “Billy Corgan, Smashing Pumpkins. Homer Simpson, smiling politely” exchange. It’s perfect.


Round 3:

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Outright Victories:

“New Kid on the Block” over “The Sweetest Apu,” “Lisa’s Wedding” over “Marge Gets a Job.”


“Stark Raving Dad” over “When Flanders Failed” – “When Flanders Failed” is actually a downer for all but the last few minutes. I give the nod to the laugh out loud “Stark Raving Dad” and moments like the psychological survey. Bart’s right, we all wet our pants every once in a while. Right?

“The Homer They Fall” over “I Love Lisa” – Whoever made the decision to have Homer’s increasing success be symbolized by increasingly lavish car washes is a national treasure. I love “I Choo Choo Choose You” but this episode is genius.

“Round Springfield” over “Krusty Gets Kancelled” – I copied and pasted the wrong episode in the bracket, but the beautiful final tribute to Bleeding Gums Murphy is too much to pass on here.

“Flaming Moe’s” over “The Day the Violence Died” – It’s been something close to a decade since I first saw “The Day the Violence Died” and to this day I can not get over how weird, truly straight up weird, the ending with Lester and Eliza is. It cuts down an otherwise great episode.

“Homer’s Barbershop Quartet” over “Homerpalooza” – Getting brained by a Grammy is one of my favorite Homer moments ever. It’s the high and low light of his musical career and I am in tears every time.

“Lisa’s Substitute” over “Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington” – So, Dustin Hoffman got an Oscar for this episode right? “Deserved” is an understatement.


Round 4:

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“Stark Raving Dad” over “New Kid on the Block” – The only moment in the show that approaches the sweetness of Bart and Lisa’s relationship is Lisa’s first word of “Bart.” Bart finally delivering with a good birthday gift is just beautiful.

“The Homer They Fall” over “Round Springfield” – Words cannot express how much I happen to love the beginning to the title fight between Homer and Drederick Tatum. “Mr. Armageddon,” “Why Can’t We Be Friends?” and “Opponent” together make me start punching pillows I’m laughing so hard.

I love “Round Springfield” but “The Homer They Fall” just kills me.

“Homer’s Barbershop Quartet” over “Flaming Moe’s” – Raise your hand if you’d like iTunes to start carrying “Baby on Board” and the rest of The Be Sharps catalog online. (Raises arm until shoulder dislocates)

“Lisa’s Substitute” over “Lisa’s Wedding” – The introduction of Mr. Bergstrom with the cowboy hat down to the digital watch continues to be a master class in comedy. It’s amazing and always is.


Round 5:

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“Stark Raving Dad” over “The Homer They Fall” – “Lisa it’s your birthday, happy birthday Lisa.” Cue tears. We’re done here.

“Lisa’s Substitute” over “Homer’s Barbershop Quartet” – It’s amazing to have an episode that dedicates itself to recognizing how special Lisa is and not go overboard with it. It’s moving and beautiful.


Round 6:

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“Lisa’s Substitute” over “Stark Raving Dad” – “You Are Lisa Simpson.” Need I say more?

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Coming tomorrow, the Lard Lad Donuts Region.