I’m an NBA Free Agent Too

By: Connor Lenahan

Earlier this morning Chandler Parsons agreed to a 4-year, $94 Million dollar deal with the Memphis Grizzlies. Ironically, he is sitting having lunch about 15 feet away from me right now. He’s understandably smiling from ear to ear, and I want in.

Today is the beginning of NBA Free Agency which is especially notable because the salary cap for the league just spiked thanks to a new TV deal. Teams are now flush with cash and looking to make a deal. 

I would like to formally offer my services as a backup backup point guard for any NBA team. I might use a wheelchair to get around, be 5’3″, and have never played basketball competitively – but I’ve got hoop dreams coach. I’ve got em bad. 

I will begin negotiations at 3 years, $45 million. Maybe Chandler’s agent can help me out.

See you on the court soon.