The Ice Planet Boston

By: Connor Lenahan

I want to make sure you didn’t miss what that photo says. It’s currently 0 degrees in Boston with 22 mph winds. It feels like -22 degrees outside. Even inside my dorm room with air conditioning I am shivering because this is, for lack of a better term, some serious bullshit.

I have long been of the opinion that being cold is not only preferable to being covered in snow – making for a more physically manageable winter – but to being hot at all. Think about it. You can bundle up under hoodies and jackets but there is a legal level of clothing you can remove on sweltering winter days.

But -22? Let’s be honest here that this shouldn’t exist. No, seriously, how in the world can it be negative degrees out? This seems like a glitch. It also seems like an excuse not to venture outdoors for the next two days.

I’m not kidding. I ordered more than my body weight’s worth of Dominos tonight figuring that I’ll only again face the outdoors when it’s not a made up temperature. I don’t want to die. And I certainly don’t want to turn into a wheelchair shaped popsicle.

Send blankets, hand warmers, and fire. Boston needs it.